~Daily Parenting Insights~
I have a pretty strong-willed kid. He challenges my parenting ability on the daily. He is full of personality and words…so many words! haha! Sam is pretty particular about what he likes and knows his own mind, as much as an 11-year-old can. He has a lot of opinions that he is forming and is full of creativity and curiosity, music and laughter, and more words. He has so much youthful exuberance and is such a sponge absorbing all of the influences around him.
All the influences…
I am his main influence. Who I am now will shape who he will become.
Am I being my best self for him? Am I showing him kindness, patience, love, forgiveness, faithfulness, and that he is safe to figure out who he is? Does he know that he is safe to fall..to mess up, and not be perfect? Do my action toward him exemplify honor and respect? Am I showing him that he matters? …that all his many many, oh so many words are important? What about responsibility and perseverance? Dedication to goals. Does he know that he is free to pave his own paths of learning and growth?
Has that ever happened to you? You are just going along your daily life and then a revelation nearly slaps you upside your head..? Just me? haha! It was parenting overload for me.
~My “Ah Hah” Moment~
This all hit me today as I was making dinner.
I was standing at the kitchen counter getting ready to make his dinner request of noodle soup and I was pleased that he was pretty eager to come and help (which he normally isn’t). I happily gave him some tasks to do, but as I looked over I noticed he was not doing it the way I wanted him to. He was totally boy smashing dry noodles in a bowl to break them up for his noodle soup. Like punching those suckers down with vengeance but smiling and laughing the whole time. The noodles were not exactly contained and were bouncing out of the bowl all over the counter. It irritated me. I was about to correct him (like I usually do) and something stopped me. Why was I going to correct him? Because he was doing it wrong? No, not really…he just wasn’t doing it my way. WOW! I have been operating out of this mindset as a parent for as long as I have been a parent.
I took that revelation to heart..to the deepest level of my heart.
~Be Your Child’s Best Life Example~

I promise to be better, Sam…to listen more and control less; to love big and let you find your own paths. -Mom
8 comments
Yes, I love those light bulb moments💡
Thanks. 🙂 I have been having a lot of them lately…which means that maybe I have been walking blind for far too long! hahaha! I am grateful for the opportunity to allow parenting and our struggles change me for the better.
😃 Interesting how parenting reveals depths we didn’t know existed and enriches our lives. By the way, we are also big on soupy noodles here!
Yes! We are our kids role model. Same goes to my mom which was the most patient woman I have ever known and because of that I too became like her to my kids and husband per say haha.
So true! There is such a fine line between guiding and controlling! A good reminder for every parent to take a second before correction to examine the reasoning behind it!
I struggle with the same issues with both of my children and find that Yes!!!! They need some space to figure things out (even fall, get up and dust themselves off) in order to navigate life’s ups and downs. Thank you for sharing! Wonderful story!
“Why was I going to correct him? Because he was doing it wrong? No, not really…he just wasn’t doing it my way. WOW!” This part hit home. So true. We are here to teach them and not control them. I learned in a seminar that we need to teach them to control themselves as oppose to us controlling them. Great article and totally applicable in my life. Thanks for sharing.
This resonated with me because I just had a similar revelation myself with my two year old. I don’t have to correct every single little thing he does that is “bad”. I can let him express himself and correct the bigger things when he can understand WHY it is bad. For now, I can just gently redirect or show him the by example rather than constantly trying to form him into this perfect little human. Realizing that was very liberating for sure